alpha alpha male

"No, I don't think I'm the best manager in the world. But I can't think of anyone better."

- The ever brilliant, gorgeous, kickass Jose Mourinho (currently with Inter Milan).

connery

There's a boy.

The first I ever saw of him, I don't recall when or where, but I do recall the punch in the gut feeling I had. Basically, he was a hottie. I especially liked that he wasn't a conventional one that everybody gushed over. Well if they did, I didn't hear any of it.

I liked his hair. It was unruly, unkempt, rumpled. Another of my favorite words - rumpled. He had nice clothes, though I never noticed what exactly he had on, only that it was very pleasing to the eye. A nice physique, nice manners (I'd imagine), nice way of speaking... Basically, everything about him attracted me. I never actively sought him out, but suffice to say, each time he appeared, he was bad for my heart.

I blush whenever I get a rush of adrenalin that comes from this exciting zing of a thing. And it distresses me somewhat that I should be so easily read. Thank heaven then he doesn't know I exist :) It would be mortifying!

twilight x 3

So this weekend, we've had really long days all week in hospital and school. No day ended earlier than 5pm, and most days we finished between 7-8pm. It was a 6-day work week, because we had classes all day on Saturday. Despite the ceaseless toil, I managed to catch Twilight sneaks multiple times this weekend. Friday, Saturday, and Sunday.

I cashed in precious sleep time for them (caught the shows in the wee hours of the morning) :) Work has hopefully not been compromised.

While it wasn't the best movie I'd ever watched, and wasn't exactly the faithful rendition of the book that I'd hoped for, it was a more than decent affair. Bella was a lot more feisty and tomboyish than I'd imagined (though Kristin Stewart really looked like the Bella I'd envisioned), and Edward Cullen a lot more serious and less teasing than I'd anticipated, they were both well-played (with Robert Pattinson doing an exceptional job), and had sizzling chemistry between them.

So Edward Cullen wasn't ruined for me, and it was nice seeing a rendition of him come to life (despite the shitty make-up and ugly contact lenses) with a pretty kickass wardrobe. Robert Pattinson looks great playing the piano.

Other characters that I thought were exceptional: Charlie Swan was fantastic, Esme was a lovely motherly creature, and Victoria was so beautiful. All in, pretty darn worth the wait!

Now, to wait for the DVD argh.

date movie

The Chamber is a movie based on a book by John Grisham. Incidentally, when I was twelve, I won the bookprize for math and was gifted with said book. I waited 3 years to read it, needless to say, after watching the movie. The movie was wonderful, but the book was even better.

Tonight, The Chamber was shown on HBO, and just like I did every time I watched it in the past, I cried over and over.

The Chamber revolves around Sam Cayhall, who is incarcerated for a hate crime he commited in the 50s as a member of the Ku Klux Klan. He was implicated in a bombing that killed a father and his 2 children, and was dished the death sentence. His children grew up with huge emotional burdens as a result of their violent upbringing, with his daughter ending up an alcoholic and his son committing suicide, leaving Sam's grandson Adam Hall (family name changed in view of the Cayhall scandal) to clean up the bloody mess at the tender age of 10. Adam becomes a lawyer and eventually heads back to Mississippi to argue a stay for Sam, because vile though he may be, Sam is family.

It is revealed that Sam did not actually intend to kill those children and their father, and had actually timed the bomb to go off when the building would be empty. But his evil accomplice (the elusive K.R.) timed the bomb to kill instead, and left Sam to face the charges while he slipped away into oblivion, propagating the KKK's legacy of hate. Sam has taken the blame wholesale for several reasons, but most of all, because he is seeking just punishment for the many hateful crimes he had committed.

Gene Hackman plays Sam Cayhall to perfection - few actors could have portrayed the many nuances and conflicting aspects of so multi-dimensional a character. Hate and racism are all Sam has ever known, and he is a product of his family's racist upbringing. With his great-grandfather a founding member of the KKK, and 3 lynchings before he was 10, Sam never stood a chance.

The most touching scene in the whole movie that never fails to make me ache and bawl, is when Faye Dunaway (who plays Sam's daughter) visits Sam in prison a few days before he is due to be executed. She has lived with the horror of watching Sam blow his defenceless black slave Joe to bits for no reason at all, as she lay hidden in the trees, and has borne great guilt because her brother had said all those years ago, that if she had asked Sam to stop, he would have and she could have saved Joe's life. During her prison visit, as she prepares to leave after telling Sam that she has forgiven him, she tells him what her brother had said, and asks Sam, "Daddy if I'd told you to stop, would you have shot him anyway?" To which Sam's face crumbles in painful anguish, and because the lie is much kinder than the truth, he says, "Yeah."

Faye Dunaway recognizes that her father loves her and regrets all the hate she was made to witness unwittingly, and that despite all his mistakes, he isn't unrepentant after all. She sobs with every fibre of her being as she lays her hand in her father's, knowing this is probably the last she will see of him.

The Chamber is one of those movies I wish I had a boyfriend to watch with, because it's so beautiful/painful.

the aircon broke down and i'm grouchy

Once in while, we'll have the good ole "morality discussion" that pops up. About how we're so focused on getting through our patients we forget to treat them like people, whatever happened to our 'purpose', and the general incessant gnawing need some of my peers have to find meaning in what we do really grates on my nerves.

Seriously - is it really so hard to find goodness and kindness and meaning in a profession that makes doing good so easy? It's not that "doing good" opportunities aren't available - if there is a problem it's that we find ways to cut corners and take advantage of situations where people are vulnerable that is the problem.

Look - spare us the the moral turpitude whingeing. We need to clerk patients and examine them for practice, and doing so when a patient is agreeable does NOT equal taking advantage of them. Seriously? I feel bad when 10 of us examine one patient with excellent signs, but if the patient is fine with it, why belabor the case? And if the patient declines, move on to the next. With 90days left to the MBBS, now isn't the time to whine about a "problem" that really doesn't exist. Patients are more than happy to share, and we're more than happy to walk away when they aren't. I think these people are seriously immature and irritating.

On a happier note, I love my job and can't wait to graduate :) though it's getting really stressful! It's all worth it!